 |
| Jacco Bezuijen, fellow police officer |
On twitter I see a message from a fellow
police officer unknown to me, come by. It is not a cheerful message, the text:
“Still much to do! By backlogs are many officers on the waiting list for PTSD
treatment”
This twitter message brings me right back
into my memory of my first encounter with Jacco Bezuijen, a police officer with
PTSD who has willingly worked along in television program; "Heroes in a
fix." Jacco goes into this broadcast into the core of his mental existence
right through the dust of honesty and humanity of serious incidents that have
made him a PTSD victim.
The day after the broadcast I cycle - in my
mind the story of Jacco repeats itself - on my bike to my police station to
work a dayshift patrol and then out of the blue I see a squirrel crossing the
road on his four feet. Next I cycle between lazy geese that lie on my bike path
next to a stream, waddle and chatter. The sun shines upon me from the left as a
brother in arms who lit my path and is highly enjoyable and nicely warm in
humanism terms.
Jacco can’t see this picture of mine from
this nature beauty in progress. Because he lives in a far of City, but twitter
made us brothers in arms. But the real question to Jacco is? Could he see the
little beautiful things every day as I do on this very moment? Who knows, I
hope dearly he does and will do so.
Arrived at the office, I take the
initiative to get in touch with Jacco by email. Probably I fail to my
initiative. Because Jacco has received countless responses to the broadcast of
him and his where a bouts in Copland who let to his PTSD. Many colleges’ men
and women call him a Braveheart, but also desperate and wounded in his
uncontrolled mind. As a matter of speech and translation to my best Dutch!
Affords.
Very soon I get a very nice personal
response from Jacco by email. This has led to a very nice collaboration of
Jacco and me. We make some times photo-blogs of beautiful moments, experiences
and life as it is to us and everyone who passes by in our eyes or the lens of
Pentax his photo camera.
I like to think and say; everybody, Grab
any occasion for the little and beautiful aspects of live as shows up before
you as an uninvited friend. Beyond consideration enjoy and embrace in the
hectic police life of every moment of every day, no matter what, at all costs.
Core: Police men and women in all shapes
and sizes run unobtrusively around to help where needed, unsolicited. Described
as proud, strong and proud. Happy are those who, in their team, can have these
heroes. As I said, they often belong to a nondescript kind as that of grey
mice. Reamers rubble of buzzing, always ready and never far away when you need
them.
That is the biggest pitfall of heroes. They
are people of flesh and blood brimming with emotions built up during their
inexhaustible work. For many years they walk around with their mind undigested
suffering, where they overstep the line over and over again.
Often to the detriment of themselves and
their families that weeps silently and want another path of glory in life, just
being happy and warm, but this family is not to be heard. As if a big wall
stands between duty and quality family time.
Some of them unfortunately couldn’t lay off
their heroic mantle and by mental plunder and force exploitation they are not
ever be able to be fully employable again. So is Jacco, what a shame and
personal disaster.
Often these heroes with a badge are the
last man standing and refuse to throw the towel in the public RING of humanity
because their job is killing them and they cannot obtain more psychical blows
on their mindset. But still they are going on strong as far as they get.
Their world filled with commitment and
pragmatism and donor interests collapses just as the great walls of Jericho in
ancient times.
Continuing to mask their distress when
mental conditions make it no longer a losing battle of society. But unhappily
they once again help themselves further into the gutter of physical need.
A real hero PTSD must not have to explain
him - her and the weakness. The thin blue line is hard and sometimes felled
much too late and much too hard by nearby every common police officer of flesh
and blood.
By their invisible psychological
masquerades the tough world around them seems to see much too late that they
are ill, no longer usable in police force matters. Debit it is a subcutaneous
matchless monster called PTSD, which is a deadly mind-blowing monster which is
secretly masters their mindset completely.
All their experience, commitment and
humanity disappears under this excessive pressure. Again and again knocked out
and beaten by the negative resistance in society, they are no longer upright to
the badge.
Eventually they remain motionless on the
scrapheap. Then it turns black before their eyes. One's own body helps them to
perform their own survival mechanism. They are completely stripped and stripped
of the daily heavy loads and finally they come to realize their sickness. The
twilight of their eyes then. Under pressure all gets liquid or diamond. That is
how it is.
Fortunately in PTSD matters, more liquids
in the form of teardrops drops floats from the eyes and cheeks downhill from
their faces of troubled policemen and -sisters in need, that indicate the
actual situation and nothing else.
The same to our fire fighters and those
brothers and sisters how are military obliged to defend our countries and the
peace on earth.
Then I get more and more in touch with
Jacco by social media. Even from his improvement process he wants to help
people against the many-headed monster PTSD in their struggle. He writes books.
He opens his heart to a human overture.
He is still there, fragile, broken as a
wounded animal in distress scrambles to his feet helped by his home and
especially his muse Sandra and his lovely children.
Despite that it allows him to the test he
takes part in the program HEROES IN A FIX (Helden in de Knel – Holland). Nice
that he does such for himself, his family and especially selflessly for other
victims of PTSD. This monster always tries to make victims around good ers and
diligent hard workers unexpectedly harsh and ruthless attack and breaks them.
The program Heroes in a fix opens Jacco’s
open personality. Openness, sensitivity and especially his human weakness,
thanks God. With trembling knees though. The Netherlands television viewers are
witnessing yet another heroic act by Jacco, this time on television.
The confrontation with the parents of Thom
means to him a lot. The Robocop Jacco is a superman. After his police harness
is revealed a tiny person is left. An upright man.
Than humanity. His eyes glisten. They are
wet with emotion, grief and injustice. These are not tears. They are die-hards.
The string that the many-headed monster to
PTSD can now be unravelled from his neck. Not once, not twice, but little by
little. Maybe not at all, but that is the hard struggle of life of this man.
In my neighbourhood policing environment I
see colleagues fail prolonged by PTSD. The police caught up with little paces
to help them. But luckily help is on its way. That’s the most important effort.
That means many colleagues who suffer from PTSD that will be discussed how the
police leadership in the future can help them at their utmost best intentions
and what work they eventually can handle yet or in the near future.
That's hard micro personal craftsmanship in
a slowly process to the large backlogs. I hope with good outcome for everybody
involved. But not in all cases, yet. Other samples such as graphs and figures
and legislation make it a difficult trail and partly impassable.
Our colleagues with or without PTSD deserve
respect and good help when this is required, from their employer.
Suddenly I realize that everyone could meet
PTSD on his or her path. So never say that will not happen to me! It is no
man’s call. Watch out for the monster PTSD, be beware of your six!
Of course I made this blog with permission from Jacco. In my mindset I often ask Jacco, what are you doing? His answer is
always; Han, Luctor et Emergo.
Okay Jacco, at your own pace and own path,
so I hope for you. You are struggling but I'm sure you emerge.
